Fuckin' Short!

Prometheus: A Fuckin’ Short movie review

This movie needs no fuckin’ short introduction so here’s a picture of it in your faces:

As a fuckin’ short editor’s note: See Alien immediately before seeing this.  The amount of connections made will boggle your mind out of your goddamn skull and fuck with it.  

Who’s in this bitch: Noomi Rapace (The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo trilogy, Sherlock Holmes: Game of Shadows), Michael Fassbender (Shame, X-Men First Class), Charlize Theron (Monster, The Italian Job), Idris Elba (Thor), Guy Pearce (Vertigo).

Da fuck is this?: Ridley Scott returns to the franchise that he defined with a unique collaboration of artistry, technology, and a stripping Sigourney Weaver.  Also most likely because he saw what a sad shit stank the “Alien” series had became and said, “Da FUCK did you guys do? I left for 20 years and you guys fuck it all up! Hold on, I got this bitches.”  That’s how I’m assuming it went down more or less.  So this is a fuckin’ BRILLIANT prequel to Alien.  Since I don’t want to spoil too much for you pussies who haven’t seen the fucking thing yet, I ain’t going to give you much.  

Why it’s the tits: Scott takes all the elements and patterns that made Alien a massively beautiful and disgusting fuckin’ mess and mated it with the 21st century.  Pretty much helped put science fiction movies back on track.  Also there were parts where I actually thought, “Da fuck… that’s messed up.” And I’ve seen some things man, and if a movie today can make me think that, it’s a damn good winner in my book.  

Favorite Scene: When David is basically alone on the ship, waiting for the ship to reach its destination and wake everyone else up.  Every moment simply shows his lack of humanity, but also his interest and desire for it.  

Favorite Line: Janek: Hey, Vickers.  I was wondering… are you a robot?

Score:

On a scale of having an alien gorge its way through your stomach lining and flesh, to discovering where we came from, this is like if we discovered where we came from and then making it back alive to fuck all the shit up and tell religious fundies to suck it.